Mood cycles

One thing I have realized lately is that I have more than one level of mood cycling. So far I have identified three levels:
– the level of episodes, which occurs over the course of weeks or months
– the monthly level, in which my mood changes along with my monthly hormone cycle
– the daily level, in which my mood changes over the course of a day (generally better in the morning and worse in the evening)

The episode level is more difficult to predict, but the overall trend is for episodes to begin in the spring. My pattern is mania — mixed state — depression. Mania can be triggered by lack of sleep or working long hours on a project. The change to Daylight Savings Time seems to make a difference as well.

I have severe premenstrual syndrome which begins shortly after the midpoint of my cycle. The worst is the few days before my period actually starts; sometimes I can barely stand to be around other people without biting their heads off, and I hate myself so much I almost want to die. You can imagine that when I am in the depressed part of an episode, and I hit the depressed part of my PMS, I feel really wretched!

I think my circadian mood changes relate to fatigue. When I wake up in the morning I generally have more energy and my mood is more positive. As I get tired over the course of the day, my mood takes a dive too. Many people have the opposite pattern, so I guess I’m a bit odd that way. Still, it makes sense to me, since mania (up mood) is associated with high energy and depression (down mood) is associated with low energy.